Eternal Apprentice

There is an awesome thing going on in our lives that we haven’t been able to string more than three words together about since it started.

Ariel and Michael.

*le sigh*

They offered us a place to stay when we came to their town for a convention. The short version of the story is that we only made it to one day of the con. We were cuddling, playing, exploring, and fucking all weekend and we couldn’t care less about the rest of the world.

By the time we left their house at the end of the weekend gas prices had dropped outside by quite a lot. We took this as a good omen since we planned on spending a lot of money on gas to come see them over and over again.

Last weekend was the third trip out to see them, and an impromptu one. We have been falling for them hard and fast and we couldn’t bear missing them any longer, so we cut out of some of our piddling responsibilities mid-week and went to spend the extended weekend with them.

It’s a strange, wonderful dynamic that has formed around the couples. Ellie and I met them as a well formed couple of three years, and their relationship is similar to ours. As we’ve got to know each other better we’ve seen that there are interesting sexual cross-attractions. All of us are in love with each other, so that’s a good first step.

Michael and I have a very special, exploratory sexual relationship. We are testing new boundaries and limits and exploring anal play. I’m really enjoying the sounds he makes when he experiences something new.

That’s not to say he hasn’t taught both of us a good bit. On our first weekend he showed us their Violet Wand (which we are now very much in love with as well). He started by giving me an electrical massage, and then some stronger sensation play with some of the lovely attachments. The ladies looked on through the blacklit room and played with each other while he worked on me.

Ariel and I had been talking online for several months and had already started to develop a pretty strong friendship. When we met we were quickly able to incorporate that friendship into the relationship that we were building. Every time we saw Ellie and Michael play we’d look at each other and giggle, it made us so happy to see them developing that bond.

The concept of a four-way relationship was not entirely foreign to any of us. Ellie and I have talked about how we feel that no one person can be everything to everyone, especially with responsibilities and constraints on their time. My fantasy has been to live in a multi-partner household where everyone is on equal footing (i.e. no 24/7 D/s or M/s dynamic). This relationship gives me hope that my dream family can exist and prosper.

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Ellie and I have synthesized down a couple rules of poly dating from all the workshops we’ve been to in the last couple years which I’d love to share:

“Never stick your dick in a crazy”

This, to me, is short for “Don’t get involved with a potential partner until you know them well enough to tell if they are crazy or not”. This is really fantastic advice for anyone with or without the requisite genitalia. Check potential partners for crazy before getting sexually involved with them. I know it can be tough to spot at first, but once you’ve seen a few examples of “crazy” you start to be able to spot it pretty easily.

Avoid, “Relationship is broken, add more people” mentality.

Make sure the relationship you are in is sound before you go looking for partners. I know how strong the urge can be to add to a relationship that is having problems. For some strange reason it is a natural response for most people to try to sabotage their relationships by bringing in a new partner. Ariel and Michael sat us down and talked about their relationship history and made us aware that they were in a good place to start a relationship with us.

“Slow the fuck down”

New relationship energy tends to make things happen very, very fast. Although it’s fun to do impulsive things with your new loves, recognizing that you have responsibilities is a major factor. At least for me with an addictive personality, I have to hold myself back at times. Ellie and I have this in common, and I’m pretty sure Ariel is the same way as well. So restraint has been the key order of the day many, many times so far, but it’s working out fantastically.

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To paraphrase The Magnetic Fields, “We’re so in love with you both, it’s like we’re on the moon, we can hardly breathe, but we feel lighter.”

..That reminds me that I need to post about breath play. I guess I’ll save that for next time.